Spring: Lovely, Luscious and Late

It's so frustrating when spring is late, isn't it? Winter just drags on and on until it seems like it's never going to end. We're all sick of grey days and bitter winds, and we can't wait for warm sunshine. When, when, oh, WHEN will spring get here?

It can't be easy to be Winter, waiting for Spring to finally arrive. Let's check on the poor guy, shall we?

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Winter is sitting at a table in the Four Seasons Bar. It's dark inside, gloomy and chilly, and outside a fitful wind is spattering sleet against the windows. His face is haggard, and his once elegant white coat is ragged and stained. He's halfheartedly sipping a cup of lukewarm coffee. The bartender catches his eye and walks over. "She's late again, huh?" he sympathizes. Winter watches him refill his cup with a mournful sigh. "Yeah. Doesn't she ever pay attention to what month it is?"

"Folks are getting pretty antsy for spring to come."

"You said it. I tell you, if I go out there with one more big storm, those people might just beat me to death with their snow shovels." The bartender laughs and walks off.

Winter shifts in his seat and looks again at his watch. Sighs.

His cell phone rings. He grabs it. "Where the hell are you? Do you have any idea how late you are? What's taking you so long?" (listening) "OK, never mind, I don't care." He rubs his forehead in exasperation. "Listen, you get up here, or you know what? I'll just tell Summer to take over, how do you like THAT? Yes, I mean it!" He slams the phone down.

"That's telling 'em, Tiger."

He'd know that sultry voice anywhere. It's Summer, of course.

He turns and looks her up and down. She's dressed in a hot red number, freshening up her August Flames lipstick. She closes her compact with a snap and smiles. "She's late again, huh?"

Winter nods. "Every other year we go through this. She stays out partying and leaves me holding the ball. We can't just have NO weather, so I have to crank out the cold stuff day after day after day. I'm exhausted. And after all these months, I'm the most hated guy in the hemisphere. Doesn't she get it? I need a rest! In a few months I'm back on duty in Australia!"

She sits down and signals to the bartender. Then she leans back and folds her arms. "Listen, why don't you make good on your words for once? Let me take over! I've been ready for months. I've got a heat wave brewing that'll make them beg for you to come back for an encore!" She laughs again - a full, throaty laugh, and he smiles in spite of himself. He shakes his head.

"Come on now, you know that's not how it goes. She's got to take over for a few weeks at least. We've got to give everyone a little time. A few balmy days so the ground thaws, all that."

She rolls her eyes. "Yeah, yeah, yeah. All those 'pretty flowers and bright green grass'. Spring! Everyone loves spring!"

The bartender catches her words as he walks over with her drink. "Spring!" he sighs, and his face goes all dreamy, "Buds on the trees, warm sunshine..."

Winter and Summer turn and glare at him. He coughs in embarrassment, sets down the drink and leaves.

"You know, it's not really in the rules. If she never shows up, who's gonna complain if I take over? Go from 30 degrees and snow to 90 degrees and a heat wave. That'd shut up those complainers, you gotta admit. And wouldn't you just love to teach her a lesson? She's a conceited brat!"

"Well..." You can see he's weakening. But just then the front door swings slowly open and the whole bar fills with light. A breeze wafts in, filled with the scent of flowers. You can almost hear the Hallelujah chorus.

"Oh, great. Look who's here. Finally." Summer snorts in disgust.

Spring steps in, dressed in a long, gauzy frock draped in lace and greenery. She pauses as if waiting for applause, then meanders daintily over. She stops in front of Winter and puts her hands on her hips. Her delicate features are spoiled by a sulky pout.

"So. I hope you're happy! I'll have you know you interrupted me in the middle of a party - I mean, a meeting with some very important people!"

"Finally!" Winter slams down his coffee mug. "We were just talking about leaving you out of the lineup this year! Summer says she'd be happy to take over if you're too busy. You could go back to your party - ahem, your meeting. We can get along fine without you."

She recoils in horror. "Don't be ridiculous! My fans would never stand for that!" She simpers and bats her eyes. "And just so you know, I'm not late. I was just - you know, building the suspense." Summer snorts again, and Spring notices her for the first time. She bites her lip, then turns back to Winter with a winning smile. "Anyway, I'm here now."

Winter stands and drinks the last of his coffee. "Well, next year, be on time, or else!" He blows a kiss at Summer, who smiles and pretends to catch it. "I'm off. Tell Autumn I'm planning on mid-November. I'll text him." He pays the bartender and leaves, slamming the door behind him.

Summer stands up and saunters over to Spring, who backs away nervously. "Well, you've taken your own sweet time. Just so you know, I pride myself on punctuality. I'm going to step in right on schedule, so you'd better get a move on. You've got till June. Then it's MY turn."

She stalks off with a flick of crimson silk and a click of heels on the wooden floor. Tossing a bill or two on the bar, she gives the bartender a smoky smile, and he takes a deep breath as he watches her go.

Spring watches her leave, frowning. Then she draws herself up, her head high. She's ready to take the stage. She steps outside.

She looks up at the heavens and smiles, and in an instant the snow stops falling. As she waves her arm grandly, the sky clears. Suddenly the world is full of warm, sweet sunshine. Birds break into song.

Around the corner, Summer takes a long drag on her cigarette and narrows her eyes. Soon, she thinks. She drops it and grinds it into the new grass. Soon.

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So there you have it. I hope Winter finally gets his well-earned rest and we get at least a few weeks of balmy Spring weather. With Summer waiting impatiently in the wings, it may not be long. We'd better enjoy the nice weather while we can. Happy spring, everyone!