Christmas For the Rest of Us

Christmas doesn't seem to be made for people like me.

It's made for the efficient, enthusiastic people who write out their Christmas lists in September, check off every item with a flourish and finish their shopping by the first of December. They're the energetic folks who decorate every inch of their yards and every room of their house, including the bathroom. They're the extroverts who love pushing through crowds, who go to every noisy event and know the words to every carol (and sing on key!). If you believe all the ads out there, everyone celebrating Christmas is full of joy, energy and the holiday spirit. They always buy just the right presents, they never fight with their relatives, and they never forget to defrost the turkey.

Where's the Christmas for the rest of us?

I can hear you now: Oh, you're one of THOSE. Where's your Christmas spirit, you say? Quit complaining and get to work. Frost those cookies! Baste that turkey! Move it! Hup! Hup! Hup!

Christmas. Sigh.

If you're tired, or lonely, or discouraged, or shy, you're not alone. There are lots of us out there. You can usually find us sitting in corners at Christmas parties, listlessly sipping cold coffee, or wandering the aisles in stores at 10 p.m. on Christmas Eve, because we put our shopping off till then. We really ought to start a club. How does "The Anti-Carolers" sound?

OK, I know, I know - I'm whining. But maybe you're one of those people, too - one of those tired, not-ready, not-in-the-mood people. I won't tell anyone, I promise. We'll keep it a secret, just between you and me,

This Saturday is the winter solstice, which is another way of saying, "OK, people, you get hardly any sun. Get over it." The days have gotten shorter and shorter, and now the sun will be at its lowest point. Maybe it's a good time to hear some comforting words.

You know what? Your Christmas doesn't have to be perfect, or even merry. I have friends who are mourning the loss of people they loved. They don't feel even the least bit merry. You might be feeling discouraged or hopeless, or just plain exhausted - it's been a hard, hard year for many of us. You don't have to feel guilty if you're not in the mood.

Maybe this year you might want to make things a little simpler. If your heart feels cold, draw close to the warmth of people who care. Let your family or friends know how you're feeling, and ask them for help. Find some ways to take extra care of yourself. Curl up with a good book. Watch a movie. Play with your dog. Find joy where you can, and remind yourself that it'll be over soon. Take it one day at a time, and you'll get through it.

My point is, Christmas isn't an obligation - it's a gift TO YOU, to all of us. You are loved and precious, and God doesn't care if you defrost the turkey or send out even one Christmas card. Christmas is God saying to you, "I love you."

So celebrate it or not, sing or not, as you feel able. Pray, if you wish. Know that your prayers are heard.

And may you have a peaceful, healing Christmas, my friend.